subtitle: GIVE US ALL YOUR MONEY
Last week, the family unit went to Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida. We had a great time, but I want to skip right past that part. Lets get to the 'lessons learned' portion of this blog post, shall we...
~ All the people of the world converge on theme parks. With so many people in one place, there are different ideas of *ahem* manners. You might want to think of yourself as the Good Will Ambassador for Yourneckofthewoods - it helps.
~ If I can see your nipples, you are showing too much cleavage.
~ You (I) might be THE ONLY person in the park wearing an Alabama t-shirt and some yahoo is going to yell "War Eagle" at you. *Twice in one week... how 'bout them apples.
~ Be sure to take out a second mortgage on your home before you visit a theme park - you will need the money to pay for food and souvenirs.
~ Yes, you CAN get a blister there.
~ To some, leggings are pants.
~ A mesh shirt is perfectly acceptable as long as you are wearing a black bra. The mesh shirt should be cropped and worn with leggings. Because they are pants.
~ If your toddler is screaming her head off in fear and a theme park employee tries to get you to take her off the ride, just tell the employee to go away. You are the one paying the future therapy bills, right?
~ "4-D" means a character in a 3-D film is going to sneeze and you are going to feel snot hitting you in the face. Yes, you paid money for that.
~ Pants (or even leggings) are not necessarily mandatory if there are water rides involved.
~ Feet + theme park = OUCH
~ Financial, culture, and fashion shock aside, theme parks are wonderful for helping families to bond and make memories.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
THEME PARKS OF AMERICA
Posted by jennifer at 11:00 AM
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31 comments:
This made me laugh soooo hard! And it's so timely--we are heading to Disney on Friday, so I think I may print this out on cards and hand them out. :)
Roll Tide!!!
Yep, I can relate to this post. It's amazing isn't it. I'm glad you had a great time anyway.
Have a terrific day. :)
AND - if you get blisters in the theme park and are not prepared, the nice people at the first aid station will give you band aids. . .but you have to walk forever to find the first aid station (thus getting more blisters!)
Oh - don't wear new shoes to the park - you WILL get blisters, no matter how comfy those new shoes are!!
LOL I can totally relateJ en.
And I just adore your slideshow.
Great job!
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Oh, wow, I'm laughing so hard I'm crying! We went to Disney World last March & I totally agree with all the above. :) You're too funny, Jenny.
Jennifer,
Your post was so funny (and so true!!). Amusement parks can be interesting places. I'm glad you had a great time with your family.
Jane
So, you had fun, right??? LOL
The whole pants things adds a double level of humour when read from this side of the pond!
Quite often I think I can't afford to get in, let alone still be solvent when I get out!!
Glad you had fun x
Great post! I always get a War Eagle for my Bama t-shirts when I wear them to theme parks too! After the Giants won the Superbowl a few years ago, my sisters and I all had matching Giants t-shirts. We wore them all on the same day while we were at Disney-the comments were endless. Some were annoying, but we mostly felt famous! Glad your family had fun! I'll be sure to pick up a pair of leggings to wear with my mesh top ;).
You forgot the best one!
You can learn how to be a bad parent just by sitting on a bench!!
Our last trip to Disney we saw a 3 year old playing with his wha who (and it was available for all to see), DH got smacked in the face by a wig on a ride and he lost his favorite hat. That was just the first day!
wow. that was soooo funny!! I enjoyed the part about leggings....and the nipples too! I'd like to add: at a theme park, everyone can wear a bikini, whether you have the body for it or not! Ohhhh.....no shame :)
"subtitle: GIVE US ALL YOUR MONEY
You got that right! LOL!
I'm not a big theme park fan. Never was. Don't know why, either... I guess I'm weird (I got that right! LOL!).
Lol, how funny. It's so nice to know I am not the only one who doesn't think leggings are "pants"...yuck!
In spite of it all, I hope you had a good time.
OH, I hope you will also pay for a new pair of panties. I peed mine.
So true. Its amazing isn't it.
Jerry Seinfeld says when the nipple makes its first appearance,...oh nevermind.
Ewww.
Perfectly awesome post. You have given me quite the visual of Theme Park America. Especially the snot part.
We've yet to do "big" theme parks with Ali - soon, though. I'll just avoid the snot.
That's hysterical because it's so true! I'm glad you guys had a blast....thinking how glad you're not like :those people" *hee hee**
In the town I grew up in, what you describe is like a trip to their mall nowadays. No lie I've seen cheeks. And she was pushing a baby stroller. People are so odd.
All very good (and funny) advice.
Name That Christmas Song
Oh the stories I could tell in the years of living in So Cal and going to Disney, Six Flags and KNotts!
For me it was the shorts with hooker heels, mini skirts white t shirts and water rides, and that was just my sister. :)
I hope you yelled back the recent game score to the War Eagle shout.
Glad you had a nice time. I love Universal! Yes, they need to scan people for their clothes! It is very costly yet everyone goes!
Looks like a fun, fun time.
Love you all,
Tiz
Haha, to true! But don't forget the crazies who don't walk but drive their Rascals (do they still make those?) around the park at breakneck speeds...
Glad the trip was fun and enlightening*
When Cara and I were there we dropped about $50 in quarters on the water guns near the Rocky & Bullwinkle ride, the chance to soak unsuspecting riders is the best attraction in the park!
I think a better vacation is going to a national park. Theme parks are so expensive and so much about money. And no class. God, there is no stronger display of classlessness than at theme parks.
Hmmm, it seems that the college girls in my town got the leggings-are-really-pants memo too!
LOL. Thanks for the heads up! Lvoe the t-shirt on the boy. Top of the food chain! ROLL TIDE! Bothers me a whole lot less when people yell War Eagle when we got the braggin rights. :)
Very funny! We don't do amusement parks for just some of those reasons! :0) You are so funny! Love the family picture.
You were in Florida??!! Well I hope the weather was nice for your visit.
I wish I had the body to be able to wear leggings as pants, but for the most part, those that do wear leggings as pants look like I do today and it isn't attractive lol
future therapy bills LOL
Are you sure that some of those other visitors weren't really park employees there to give you a chuckle?
OMGosh, you crack me up!
That post tickled the 4D right outta me! LOL! Glad y'all had a great time!!! Now I have to wonder how you are gonna top the Disney tickets for the kids for Christmas from Last Year!
Miss Ya!
Love Ya!
Mean It!
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